Careful How We Label Ourselves!
Submitted by Comfort on October 10 2000 17:24:48
In reply to Our thought life submitted by Dirk Gently on October 10 2000 14:24:05
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Another of the ways we can guard our hearts and come against Satan's strategy to get us to believe that we are OK staying attracted sexually to boys is to avoid adopting an identity for ourselves that, in a defeatist manner, says, "This attraction defines who I AM." To infuse a sexual attraction into the process of self-identity and adopt it as a component of who we are gives that sexual attraction validity - it justifies it. Because then you can say, "I cannot change, please do not attack my sexual attractions, because by doing so, you attack my entire identity." By calling yourself a "boylover," and interpreting sexual desire for boys as a component of your basic identity as a person ("What am I?" - "I am a boylover" like "I am a Christian") you implicitly demand that others accept your desires as a part of who you are, and insinuate that calling into question the morality of those desires is a personal attack and Unchristian. It is no more wise for someone who has an unhealthy sexual and emotional attraction to boys to call themselves a "boylover" than it is for someone who struggles with foul language to personally identify themselves as a "Cusser," a married man who struggles with sexual thoughts about women to identify himself as a "luster-after-women-who-are-not-my-wife" or someone who has identified a problem in their life with materialism as a "money-lover." Such an attitude belies an acceptance of the behavior it describes as tolerable. The formers of this forum state, "Identifying oneself as a boylover demands much personal courage." I say, Do not identify yourself as a boylover - refuse to accept such a label that really says, "I am resigned to accepting these desires as a part of who I am, and will not endeavor to rid my life of them." A sinful attraction to boys is no more an identity or an 'orientation' than an affinity for hurting people's feelings or a tendency to overeat. Don't do things to justify sinful thoughts or behaviors that encourage them to continue! Change your behavior to change your thoughts. Begin to identify yourself as the New Creation that God made you to be - "I am a child of God!! And God did NOT create me to dwell on thoughts of sexual intimacy with teen boys! That's sin and it needs to stop! |
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