Well,
Submitted by Mark on January 25 2001 21:47:57
In reply to Perhaps your assumptions are off track submitted by Jimf3 on January 25 2001 20:32:09
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I don't think it's quite that simple. Research that I've seen (e.g., Constantine, Rind, etc.) shows that outcomes of sex between men and boys varies tremendously. Sometimes it is harmful, and sometimes it is not. And as I posted, I have a gay colleague who, when he was 14, began a sexual relationship with a man 30 years older than him. The relationship lasted through college, and my friend found it to be very loving and recieved much joy from it. He kept in touch with the man for many years afterward. Similar positive experiences are documented by researchers such as Sandfort and Savin-Williams. On the other hand, there are stories of boys who later found the relationships to be abusive. Why is this? Certainly coerced, manipulated, or subtly pressured sex is harmful and unacceptable. What about willing sexual relationships? How often do boys later feel harmed by them? Why are some boys harmed and others not? Is it because of their own level of (in)security with their sexuality? Is it because some of them internalize society's view of boylovers or man-boy sex as evil or shameful? Is it because the man sometimes doesn't meet the boy's emotional needs? Is it because some men later reject the boy? Is it because some boys are not emotionally mature enough to handle the relationship? Is it due to the boy's or the man's personality? These are complicated questions that the research hasn't begun to address or even consider. Mark |
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