Re: Welcome, TESTED
Submitted by Tested on February 27 2001 19:31:28
In reply to Welcome, TESTED submitted by Ford Prefect on February 27 2001 12:24:20
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Thanks to all of you who responded so kindly. I do feel among friends here. It is wonderful to hear from all ages. It is interesting that in the midst of living of life of insecurity, fear of discovery, of making some major mistakes and using poor judgment, of going through a depression and feeling suicidal, of nearly losing my marriage that I would find myself being offered a job of working with children. Isn't wonderfuly that God can see through all the "stuff" and recognize a strength that only needs to be used. My YFs go back to being a teenager, and particularly with one of my young nephews. He is grown now with a beautiful wife and two terrific children. He and I are good friends. The sexual attraction is no longer there, but we have found a deep relationship that is far more valuable to me than what happened so many years ago. From the experience with my nephew, I learned more about being a true friend to boys. When my work began over 10 years ago it included working with boys that I have always been attracted to. But as I worked with them, got to know them, learned about their feelings and experiences, the sexual urges faded. My first most meaningful moment with a boy came, when one day he climbed up into my lap, put his arms around me and started to cry because he knew his mother was dying from a long-term illness. That's a pretty heavy burden for a 10-year-old. We held each other until he felt better. From that moment I knew my work with children was extremely important, and I would do everything I could to control my urges and focus on what they needed from their grownup friend. I make dozens of YFs every year. I receive many, many hugs. It's all worth it. Love you all |
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