Some practical suggestions
Submitted by Nate on January 13 2002 00:07:16
In reply to err...that problem i talked about heh submitted by foxfire on January 10 2002 17:37:21
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After searching high and low, I found a website that offers some practical suggestions for overcoming masturbation at: http://www.ldolphin.org/mormon.html. It is written by the Mormons - which I do not endorse - but I find the list of suggestions to be useful. I agree with most of what has been said by others here so far. What I think would be most important is deciding why you would want to learn to stop masturbating. I too have not been able to support in Scripture what has been taught to me by tradition in my church - that masturbation is a sin. There is only one reference (to nocturnal emission, in Levitius) which names the emission of semen as making one ceremonially unclean. The "penalty" is a need to wash and to wait until evening. This "sin" is right up there in the list with a woman having her period, so I think it is absurd to use this as an example of an unnatural act. Actually, the "penalty" for the womans period is three times worse that the mans! Everything that I have read which supports that masterbation is a sin starts with an arguement something like, "It is OBVIOUS that God did not create man for this purpose...". Personally, I find that it works quite well for me. Anyway, I decided that I wanted to gain control over my habit of masturbation as a type of fast, or a spiritual discipline, rather than out of a sense of guilt or legal requirement. I found that having an Action Plan detailing things to do when I was tempted to be helpful. It was also important to know how to take it, not if, but when, I failed. Before I give anyone the impression that I was able to do away with my sexuality, let me say that I did not. In fact, my experience was quite the opposite. For me, the whole experience of remaining chaste was extremely erotic. By the second week, I was so sensitive to stimulation that simply walking was a sexual experience, driving the car was a turn-on, and eventually, just sitting still in my chair could bring me wave after wave of near-orgasmic sensations. Of course, all of this was incredibly distracting. I was unable to concentrate on work, and most days were entirely unproductive. As the weeks wore on, rather than not fantasizing - I found myself lost in greater and deeper emotional depravity than I have ever known. I won't say how long I did go, because the one thing I learned was that my best effort did not make me any more holy than anyone else. Rather, the whole experience seemed to be drawing me away from God! I stopped trying when some real-life emotional situations required my attention, and it seemed stupid to continue to stress myself like that, too. One day, I may start again, but at a much more moderate pace. I think that I should plan times for release, as someone else suggested, and gradually increase the length of time between them. I do believe that, keeping with the plan, I could eventually train myself to not need masturbation - but right now, I can't afford the added stress in life. Once again, just to repeat what others have said: God seems not so much concerned about what you do with your penis as He is with who (or what) you worship. Take care of that, and the behaviors will come into line. As for me, I remain at a loss as to how in the world I am to remain in a sexless state as required by the church, since I am unmarried. Peace, Nate |
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