Re: OK why the title boylovers?
Submitted by sally on March 25 2002 01:26:24
In reply to Re: OK why the title boylovers? submitted by Jules on March 24 2002 18:01:20
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Jules, thanks for taking the time to answer. I do understand the usefulness in labels. I just have a problem with a Christian retaining a sinful label because of Paul saying, "That is what you were, but now you are washed..." 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 Know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God? Be not deceived: neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor effeminate, nor abusers of themselves with mankind, Nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners, shall inherit the kingdom of God. And such were some of you: but ye are washed, but ye are sanctified, but ye are justified in the name of the Lord Jesus, and by the Spirit of our God. Shall I call myself a Christian Thief or a Christian Drunkard? I suppose it comes back down to the question of whether boylove is sin. I'm aware, though, that it's easier for me to abandon the term 'boylover' that it is for some others, because I've also discovered a growing attraction to women, and so my attraction to boys no longer defines the whole of my sexuality. Some of the men here, however, don't have that luxury, and for a long as they are attracted exclusively to boys, the term boylover can be a useful label for that orientation. (The issue of whether change is always desirable, or possible, is a separate issue, on which I don't want to comment in this discussion. Another time, maybe.) OK You say that you wouldn't call yourself a 'man-lover' in the sense of being attracted to men other than your husband; and of course you're right that the term would be unhelpful. However, there is a label that I think you would be happy with, without it implying lust, which is simply 'straight' or 'heterosexual'. That in itself doesn't imply that you are lusting after men; it simply states what your sexual orientation is (and what direction you would be tempted in if your guard were dropped). I think of the term 'boylover' in the same way. It doesn't have to imply lust or uncontrolled desire; it simply refers to an orientation (which can also lead to temptation). Of course, the wider world of 'boylove' means a lot more by it, namely unashamed eroticism, and I sometimes wish there was a different word we could use here. I don't think I would call myself a Christian heterosexual but then if I did I don't think there is anything sinful about being heterosexual. I do believe there is something sinful in being attracted to boys. Do I think you choose it? No, that is not my point. We are born sinners. Some with strong predisposition to one sin some to another. I never decided, one day, that I would be a drug addict when I grew up. I never thought I'd like to waste seven years and hundred of thousands of dollars and see my friends die. That was not the desire of my heart. Still my desire for drugs was always sinful and I now that I am a new creation I would not dare call myself a Christian drug addict. I am a dearly loved child of God. Sally |
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