Re: Romans 1? !!!!
Submitted by Bill on May 13 2002 18:18:08
In reply to Re: Romans 1? !!!! submitted by Splash! on May 11 2002 00:50:40
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Hi Splash I find I waver between feeling terribly guilty because of my thoughts and things and letting things slide. There must be a middle way where we are aware of sin and the anger/sadness it must cause our Father (and maybe our friends/wife too), yet not so overburdened with guilt that we collapse under it. I do think I tended to rationalise things too much and so ended up by thinking and doing that which really is not aceptable. There is part of me that longs to be free from loving boys and living what is described as a normal life. How much easier it would be. I could function within the church without feeling I am always hiding behind a mask. But all I have read, and all that has been said to me,has lead me to understand that there is NO freedom from my orientation; that I will always be drawn to boys (and often them to me also) I guess that is the way it has to be???????? I know that if my wife had left me or leaves me in the future, that one very big restraint will be gone, and I might find it very hard not to seek a friendship with a youngster. So pray I will not do anything to turn her away, wreck our marriage, and probably the reat of my life with it. Sorry this has been a bit of a ramble - I guess I am somewhat muddles in my thinking - maybe there are some in the forum who could straighten me out!!!! Bill |
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