Re: Selfish? You make me laugh!
Submitted by Ben on April 26 1999 at 07:17:15
In reply to Selfish? You make me laugh! Submitted by tks on April 25 1999 at 18:41:07
|
tks - Thanks for taking an interest. As I had described in an earlier post I am much closer to M than to C. C is trying desperately to be his own man and to not be grouped with M or his other brothers. Down the road, C may get into a rebellious stage. Already he can be more difficult to handle than the other kids in the family (in today's world of kids most people would probably consider him a saint...it's all relative). This is why I always give C a hug too, always include him in jokes and games, and everyonce in a while just try to engage him so that he knows that I love him too. Today, he brushes me off, but someday, when he is really down, he will know that I love him. You must love kids when they are the hardest to love. With M, loving is so easy. He is so sweet, so open and loving, always starting a conversation, always coming up with something funny to say...a real conversationalist. I love him more than words can say. The closer I get to him, the less I need to fantasize (sexually) about him to know that love. He is happy to be hugged (I guess that is the Christian in him) and every time he calls my name, it is like a symphony to my ears. My point is this: I will love them both equally, but M might respond more right now. That means that M and I will probably play together more and talk more. Someday though, C may need me more and at that time he will KNOW that I love him and am there for him. You are not alone. 
Ben |