Re: sigh
Submitted by Dakota on 2009-06-26 15:05:16, Friday
In reply to sigh submitted by marc on 2009-06-26 07:09:13, Friday
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There's no way to know for sure, of course, but I seriously doubt your YFs would be disgusted with you if they knew you were a pedophile. In fact, they may already suspect it. Kids pick up on things and are a lot more intuitive than many people think. Kids are also a lot less judgmental than adults, so don't beat yourself up over what they might think or feel. They would probably be ok with it. They may even feel complimented by the attraction and feel loved because you care enough about them to keep it in check. Who doesn't like knowing someone finds them attractive? You're being harder on yourself than they ever would be. I can understand why you feel disgust for yourself cause I've felt the same way at times. But the disgust you feel is without merit and I believe is directly from Satan to try to rob you of the joy in life you should feel and to separate you and make you less useful to God. You may have an inappropriate desire that is in no way your fault. And you've dealt with it and are living with it, and have used it for the betterment of kids, whom the Bible tells us God cherishes. How is that disgusting? You should be patting yourself on the back instead of beating yourself up. When you look yourself in the mirror, you should hold your head high. You're dealing with something in a positive way that most so called normal people would crumble under, or give in to. When the day comes when you finally meet God, I'm quite sure he will smile at you and say "Well done good and faithful servant. Now it's time to lay your burdens down and live with Me for all eternity in paradise." Till that time comes, try to see yourself more like God sees you, and not how the world sees you. Dakota |
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