Thank for talking about the 800lb gorilla in the room that we sometimes prefer, out of pride perhaps, not to refer to. We do indeed need these relationships and we need to make the effort to build them; I'm very aware in myself of not making that effort and then whinging that I don't have any friends... On the other hand the challenge that most of us have to be intimate, in a non-sexual way, without it revealing that we are a BL, is a big block to real friendships.