What I'm suggesting is that Youth has a choice in his life at the moment in a way that those of us who have lived as BLs for a long time don't, and I'm seeking to encourage him to focus on the gay choice over the BL choice. I'm writing as someone who has seen his AoA wander all over the place largely as a result of the circumstances I've been in and the way I've responded to those circumstances; when I've sought to establish focus on the older end then I've seen my AoA rise. But when I've focused on younger ones, it's been problematic. Given how young Youth is, his AoA still comes up to his own age; I'm hoping he will avoid the mistake I made somewhere along the line of losing that link.