tog, we are who we are. We cannot control that we are BLs and I have yet to know anyone or anything that would convince me that God will change our sexuality. We are not sick, we are human. All humans seek love and intimacy from others. It is a fundamental part of being human and children who don't get it will have issues of some kind. We as BLs seek this not in a same age peer as homosexuals or heterosexuals do but we seek it in boys. We cannot control or change this nor did we ask for it, so we must work with it however we can.
I'm sorry you feel this way tog. I KNOW I don't deserve to die for this and I don't think any other BLs do either. We are all children of God and do not deserve to die for any reason. Christ died for our sins so we would not have to and you don't either. Being a BL in and of itself is not a sin, though we can sin sexually just as anyone else can.
If you want I am would like to keep talking with you about this as long as you need, whether here or Lifeline.
Your brother in Christ,