I do feel for you youth. I think you're a little dramatic for my tastes, but this last post was nice and level and I can really feel for you. There are lots of people on and from this forum that share a lot of your troubles. Some are worse. Some are better. I will keep you in my prayers, I really will.

I guess in some ways its hard to escape misfortune. Out where I live a few months ago on the news a millionaire committed suicide. What, with the money to buy whatever you wanted, could be so bad that he killed himself? I don't know. It wasn't worth it, but still, something was there that pushed him to the point of thinking it was worth it. Just like you, I know you aren't at that point, but still, its not worth it to kill yourself. There are ways out. Maybe try starting new again - I don't know your situation at all really, but maybe there are options. I think until 18 you can go into a care home or whatever they're called? Thats a little extreme, but if you really have no family, that might be a new start?

And yes, God is there with you, even if you can't see it now. Thats very little consolation (if any), but I say it because its true. I'll pray for you

Deliverance