I wasn't trying to be mean, I was just trying to be honest. Yes, I know some people use the "being honest" excuse to justify them being mean, but that isn't my intent.

The reason I say you're obseesed is simply because I think you're obsessed. I've been there. I know quite well what it's like. At one point when things were going badly with my YF, I cried so much thru the night that my pillow was literally completely soaked thru. And I know that when you're in such a state, life without the object of your obsession is unthinkable. But while you may experience some joys by catering to this obsession, it will bring you great pain in the long run that far outweighs any joys you get from it. In some ways it's like drugs. When you're addicted to them, you can't imagine life without them. It can get to the point where drugs are the only thing that give you pleasure, and life seems dull and worthless without them. But as I'm sure you know, staying addicted to drugs will eventually destroy you.

But unlike drugs, it might not be necessary that you totally cut yourself off from your YF. Maybe you can find a way to have a healthier relationship with him without letting it become your entire life. A big part of your life, sure. Even a HUGE part of your life is ok. But your entire life? Not good.

As I said in my previous post, I don't have any answers for you. I have no idea how you can deal with this obsession. I don't even know how I got over mine, except that I'm sure God played a big role in helping me get over it. The reason for my reply was just to warn you about how much obsessions can hurt, and to encourage you to focus more on trying to deal with the obsession instead of trying to find ways to cater to it.

But when all is said and done, it's your life to live as you choose. And while I'm not going to blow a bunch of sunshine up your butt by telling you that everything if fine when I see a train wreck in your future, I can refrain from commenting on it if you prefer.

Dakota