I think that society encourages 'perfectionists' because of the extra quality that they bring to their work. Many perfectionists end up close to the top of their chosen profession but the problem comes when they have to work with others where their expectations can be obsessive and overdemanding. If a person is not naturally perfectionist he will inevitably resist and this can lead to confrontation. This was the case many times during my teaching career. Those amongst my pupils who themselves appreciated really high standards responded very positively but I am not sure that any of them are more likely to become more compassionate people as a result. Perfectionists are rarely 'people' people: we tend to be too wrapped up in personal projects and see people as fellow workers rather than as wonderful beings in their own right. In my own case I find just 'having fun' almost impossible. I take life far too seriously and when it all gets too much I tend to just 'opt out' for a while, when all my perfectionism vanishes and I become a total slob for a few hours (but never a happy one) . . . . a sort of jekyll and hyde almost.
I'm pretty sure that many addicts, alcoholics and drop-outs are really perfectionists who have just not been able to live up to their own unbearably high standards. . . . . this is partly the fault of a society which encourages perfectionism at the expense of a more rounded and less obsessive view of life . . . . .
The danger is especially acute for the young Christian with perfectionist tendencies who thinks that God is actually calling him to be even more perfect. (I think young moslems might have even more of a problem with this.) It can lead to serious depression and even suicide in extreme cases (I knew one person who did this) and I have a horrible feeling that many young terrorists are probably perfectionists. I am aware that Jews are particularly prone: their own faith certainly encourages it: [Moses has to be the perfectionist's perfectionist and of course St Paul was another, although St Paul's faith actually breaks this cycle in an important way I think. Wasn't it the case that Paul's experience on the road to Damascus was partly his realisation that his obsession with the Law was the problem rather than the answer? ('Why persecutest thou me?')It's also one reason why Jews are so successful in their professional lives.
Perhaps what Paul realised in that flash was that the saving grace in the life of the perfectionist is love. When he falls in love it breaks that cycle of perfection-seeking at least for a while and can help him to discover that all his efforts, however good the results (although the perfectionist can never enjoy his own work: when he looks at it he sees only the flaws), do not have quite so much significance in the scheme of things. It doesnt stop us being perfectionists but it helps us to see that we can love people for their imperfection as much as their perfection which is what I think Cat was saying in this thread. . . . . It can also help us see that our perfectionism is not the strong point that we had thought it was and that a little sloppiness here and there might be a necessary price to pay for a normal life although it even hurts for me to say that.
I remember what a revelation it was to learn that the medieval cathedral builders actually insisted on putting deliberate flaws into their buildings (although the thought of actually doing that in my own work still fills me with horror.) They could teach us a thing or two.