Yeah, that's probably it.

I've been thinking a lot these days about how he hasn't been in my life for like 3-4 years, and I haven't made any real friends (YF or otherwise) in that whole time, mostly because I haven't been able to deal with the loss and/or projected future heartbreak. I want to move on for real now (finally!) and I guess the dream is a sort of metaphor? My YF symbolically 'dying'.

Maybe what unsettled me about the dream is that I felt very little loss, and instead a sort of freedom. Like he's really gone now, and I can fall in love again. I know I'm always gonna feel something special for him, but maybe it needs to go in the 'fond memories' department instead of the "OMG-I'm-never-gonna-find-anyone-like-him-and-yes-I-like-you-etc-but-you're-NOT-him-and-oh-I'm-so-sad-now!-why-can't-time-just-turn-back-and-we-can-be-together-again-I-wanna-die!!!"

I'll see what I dream tonight...but I think I'm on the road to healing.