I empathise with this post Youth.

I have emotional attachments to boys from my teen years whom I loved still lingering in my heart and I haven't seen them for over 20 years. In my case I don't have a "where are they now"... I literally have no idea.

I carried the hurt of the loss of them for a very long time.

At some point I came to realise that my attachment is not to them so much as my idea of them... or perhaps my memory of them. It doesn't make it any less emotional to realise it's all in my head, but it does help me to know I don't have to be actually involved with them to deal with it. I don't have to go looking for them.

I got attached to boys who in every respect are gone now. Were I ever to meet the men they have become I'd have to start the relationships all over again... especially since I'm a man now myself.... and it would be totally different. Do they have any lingering attachment left for me?... do they even remember me? Who knows.

I can't ignore my attachments or my emotional losses. They are part of my story and I will always carry them with me. Part of maturity for me was learning how to keep the emotions but let go of the people themselves.

Blessings
Cat.