I know it's stating the obvious... but boys are temporary creatures.

I need to state it because I find in myself a desire to have them NOT be temporary. My ideal desire is for a boy who doesn't grow up.

It has been difficult for me to reconcile what I desire with what IS. Even at my age (40ish) I'm still struggling to come to terms with it.

I have no desire to deny a boy his growing up, his manhood, nor his life, nevertheless, the idea of a boy who could stay with me as a boy is the thing I deeply long for. The other day I was reading about how they can give drugs to transgender kids to put off the onset of puberty with a view to making future transition to their perceived gender physically/surgically easier. As soon as I read this my mind says to me "drugs that can keep boys as boys for longer... I want them!" Silly mind :S

I have really been trying to get my brain to recognise that boys are temporary. To really see it and own it and adjust to it.

When I fall in love with a boy I want it to last forever.... but this is painfully unrealistic. I think I can love a "person" forever, but I have to be willing in the course of that loving to let him go through (and come out of) the various stages of his life... and that includes his childhood.

Sigh.

They grow so fast.
Appreciate it while it lasts, Cat.

Blessings
Cat.