I am a boylover and a father.

As Blackstone rightly said, it is my experience that a son does not fill the place that a YF can fill.

I love and adore my sons and find them much easier to love than my daughter... though I do love her also very much.

I believe that as a boylover much of my internal wiring is crossed up. Where others see clear distinctions between themselves, their children and their ideal lovers/companions, for me there is intense and often very confusing overlap. The one whom I wish to love is also the one whom I want as a peer is also the one I identify with myself is also the one I feel paternal towards. Of course at times these feelings exist in isolation around any one person or another... but predominantly I notice the overlap.

I know that growing up I longed to be a father, but not a husband. My instincts turned out to be correct... I'm a pretty good dad, but a hopeless husband :(

Blessings
Cat.