You see it as negativity because you imagine that the result is a sad, lonely, and pointless life. But that's a false dichotomy. A happy, full, fulfilling, and purposeful life is quite possible, perhaps even common, without the mythical relationship you seek. The choice isn't between pursuing this impossible dream or being miserable. It's between seeking happiness through pursuing an incredibly unlikely relationship or through seeking happiness through more reasonable means. Both end in happiness, but one is almost guaranteed to fail.