he's 17 and i'm waiting
Submitted by Splash! on January 28 2002 16:40:44
In reply to When young friends grow old submitted by tigris on January 26 2002 22:08:34
|
By the way, I don't mean anything sexual when I say, "He's 17 and I'm waiting." First, do you remain in contact with your young friends? What kind of relationship do you have with them? Do they want to remain friends with you? Are you still motivated to remain friends with him, or has the relationship fizzled. I moved out of the house I shared with my YF and his mother. He was almost 14 at the time, and I had lived with him for a few years, and had known him for a few years before that. I had already moved out previously, but his mother begged me back a couple months later. But again we couldn't stop arguing about things -- our lives were very stressed by bills and various things going on at home and at our jobs. We did not part on good terms; therfore, I didn't make phone calls. I didn't want to talk to her, and I didn't think she wanted me to talk to her son. So, I wrote letters instead -- one every month at least. A couple times he called me, and wrote me a letter once or twice. The last time I heard from him was when he was 15 and his mother had him call me because he was getting into trouble. It was the last time we got along. I saw him a few times when he was 16. One time I was working at his school, and he was somewhat surprised to see me. He looked up and stared at me for about a minute or two (a long time). I nodded at him and stared back. Then, he walked over to talk with some friends, occasionally looking over at me. A little while later he walked right by me, within a foot of me. He acted like he didn't know who I was. Very strange. I've seen him since then, and we've talked. I was able to make him laugh and smile, but I still get the feeling that he's uncomfortable about me. It may be because I was his spiritual mentor for several years, and now he's far from being spiritual. Or it may be because his mother and her new boyfriend have said things about me which has affected the way he views me. So now I wait for him to seek me out. He knows where to find me, and I know where to find him. But I really feel that I've done all I could do for him, at least until he's ready to be mentored once again. For now, he seems to be very caught up in high school life (sports, girls, cars, partying, alcohol, being popular, etc). Second, what do they think of you when they look back and remember the way that you treated them? I can't wait for that day when he tells me what I meant to him. I'd love to know that I had a positive effect on his life and fulfilled some kind of purpose and calling in his life. I always see older kids coming back to visit the teachers they had when they were younger. They usually say something like, "You were the best teacher," or "Thank you for..." doing such-and-such. I'm reminded by something Trevor says to his teacher, Mr. Simonet, in Pay It Forward, "You're my teacher. You get paid to care." But what about people like us? We don't get paid and how often do people think to thank us for the impact we made on their lives? I pray I don't have to wait much longer before my now-17-year-old YF comes to me with his memories of our times together. Splash P.S. I posted something similar to this a couple years back. Also, check out Forgiven's reply to it. |
Follow ups: