Re: Here's from me
Submitted by Ben on 2002-06-20 06:52:39, Thursday
In reply to Here's from me submitted by Jules on 2002-06-19 18:10:20, Wednesday
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Hi Jules, Thanks for your wisdom. I guess the big question that I have is this: You talk about trying to be Christ-like, dealing with our nasty side and adding the fruits of the spirit. I feel like I have grown in many areas. I don't get angry at people any more, I am much more patient, better at listening, more kind even in difficult situations and definately less materialistic (though I still have a way to go). But doesn't the fact that I spend so much of my life wanting to be around boys, just so that I can look at them, enjoy their beauty, their smiles and yes, their bodies too, mean that I am deliberately turning from God? I would never touch a boy sexually....I never have, and certainly I deal with the sexual release part privately, so that a boy never knows the depth of my feelings, but this is nevertheless the lust and idolatry that is spoken against in God's Word. In this one area, I am not really growing. I take one step forward and one step back, always landing on the fact that I just can't get enough of twelve year old skateboarders with their shirts off, grinding some rail. I have even become somewhat of an amateur photographer at it (which boys generally love anyway) and I've done some great shots of them playing sports and just being boys. I know that there is nothing that could ever be accused of sexual, but in my own heart, there is a sexual drive and I just don't see any biblical acceptability for this. Anyway, I'd welcome your further ideas on this. Thanks for caring. I am on your continent fairly regularly but not on your particular island :-))) That's a whole other story of course.... You are not alone. Love, Ben |
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