Guest Introduction (long)
Submitted by d on February 11 1999 at 21:46:04
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[Warning, this gets a tad graphic a few paragraphs down so if you are weak, leave now] [Adapted CBLF and posted 2/11/99 under the same title] [originally posted 2/4/99 to BC under title "guest introduction (long)"] This is my introduction. Before coming here I met joel [not a CBLF regular] on an IRC BL channel and we had a nice discussion (he knows most of what I wrote below). He gave me the URL of his web page which had a pointer to the BC forum. I consider myself a guest in BL forums. Read on for details. First, I am not a "boylover" in the sense that many of you are. I hope that my presense doesn't offend or intimidate any of you. I am a Christian. [** graphic paragraph **] For the past several months I have been reading about various kinds of sexual attractions besides typical adult m/f (which is where I am), m/m, and f/f relationships. I've read about people who like animals, children, inanimate objects, multiple people at the same time, and people who play roles like d/s, s/m, infantilism (AB/DL). I've read pro-[insert philia] and anti-[insert philia] for most of these. I have lurked and participated in message and "live chat" groups. [** end graphic paragraph **] I have also visited "recovery" groups for several of these. These discuss people who were trying to change what they were or come to terms with what they were but trying to avoid acting on their nature. Note: I would not recommend any adult try to change their sexual nature unless they want to or feel like they need to (say, for religious reasons). It is frequently impossible and when it is possible, it is very diffucult (I've know of a few people who have done so successfully, but only with great effort). I would recommend celibacy outside of marraige (for my own religious reasons as well as practical reasons) even though it can be a hard thing to do. Indirectly related to BL (but more directly related to bad parenting) I have lurked on several child-abuse and child-sex-abuse forums. When I post (and I have already done so at least one) I will try to respect the forum. Not coming from the same place most of you do, I may come across as unintentionally rude at times. Please assume I am ignorant and correct me accordingly. I know that love (be it based on erotic love, brotherly love, willing-to-take-a-bullet-for love, etc.) is a beautiful thing and should be encouraged in its proper place. There are two people who are not my blood relatives that I know I love enough to die for, no questions asked. One is the women I asked to marry (she said no, but we are like siblings now) and the other is a (you guessed it) now-teenage boy who I started mentoring many years ago through his school. Some questions I get a lot: Are you a reporter? No. And I'm not in law enforcement either. Are you a researcher? Not in the technical sense, although I do consider this a personal research project. My goal is to meet people who I would not otherwise meet and appreciate where they are coming from. Are you weird (you sound weirder than us)? Maybe, but unless what I am doing is offensive or intimidating, I don't care if you think of me as weird. I would ask that if you disagree with what I say, you not flame me personally (feel free to flame what I say, however). And a question I haven't been asked yet but which is relevant here: As a child, did I have a BL relationship? Not that I know of - I had adults of both genders outside my family (plus wonderful parents and other relatives) who obviously cared a great deal about me. None of them did anything even borderline illegal. I have no clue if they were attracted to my body or not (I assume not, since >>50% of people are not attracted to kids sexually). Again, I hope my presense is tolerated (or even welcome). -d (d_fpc@goplay.com) |