Interesting question
Submitted by F.O.D. on November 25 1999 at 22:53:22
In reply to Interesting Submitted by Mark on November 25 1999 at 21:44:25
|
Hi Mark! Trying not to be needlessly brutal, I believe it's ultimately plain selfish to direct your sexual desires according to fading outward physical "prettiness". I mean, so often a boylover will say "I'm not gay, I'm a boylover! I have to accept that the attraction will fade" (sorry Ben, not meaning to step on your toes more than needed! ;) ) Well what the hell makes us boylovers so damned more special than the other odd 99% of humanity (don't take my angry mode of expression too seriously, I'm just trying to convey solemnity and seriousness of thought) What do the swimsuit calendars and Playboys portray? Elegant 55yo grandmothers? No way! Nubile 20-something beauties with smooth skin and golden hair, every time! Why? Because 55yo men do not buy these things? No way! Of course they do! Youth is idolised. It is the Ideal. We merely find ourselves on the far end of this idealisation, being attracted to those beauties who have not even made their way yet to cynical adulthood. So what does this mean for a standard heterosexual? Will the 55yo man abandon his aged wife and take on a 20-something nubile beauty? No! That man will marry in his youth, marry a 20-something nubile beauty that he find ravishingly attractive, and they will grow together, they will grow old together. And because this man takes his love for her seriously, he will maintain and enfire his sexual desire towards her, even as her physical beauty fades and she no longer becomes outwardedly attractive. Would he have looked twice at this wrinkled grey-hair madame, had he never known her? No, probably not, you could say. But starting with that physical fire of the loins that they shared in their youth, they keep it going into the twilight, defying the drag of senescence to overcome them. So why should we, boylovers, obtain some special privileges not afforded to the vast majority of heterosexuals? What makes us so special, that we can claim the right to pass from one beloved to another, while our married friend beside us has to work to not lose the affection he once had for his wife? We should not be so self-centred. So, turning to your question (a most interesting one it is): Can you fall in love with a man who you did not know as a boy? No, I may well not fall in love with just any man. I'm not attracted to men, I'm a boylover. But, some of the boys I'm attracted to have indeed passed the Age of Consent. As I grow and as they grow, my attraction towards them remains, and with them attraction to others of their generation who I may not have met. I might put it this way. I am never attracted to men, only to boys. But I consider a boy to be anyone younger than myself. Sorry if this reply was a little more heavy-handed than you were expecting, Mark. I guess it's a matter I feel strongly about. I like your description of your 16yo YF: "maybe? sort of?" :) What does he think of you? That's the real defining question... :) Love, F.O.D. |