Re: Struggles
Submitted by Echo Free on December 27 1999 at 00:25:19
In reply to Re: Struggles Submitted by Compasion on December 26 1999 at 02:10:27
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Yes, ofcoarse you are right. All Love comes from our Fauther in Heaven. Yet you also named a key ellement in my current dillema. Sin. When we accept Jesus as our Saviour, we are 'Made new in Him, that was crucified.' Sin is powerless over all who are of Christ. Jesus says that we will not be tested beyond what we can endure. That there is always a way out. He doesn't say we will take it. When I first became a Christian, and was washed free of my Sins by the blood of The Son. I had a vision. It has been burned into my mind, a reminder of the pain 'I cause'. And the Love he gives. Let me tell you this vision. I was upon my knees in prayer, when I felt the spirit take me. I was taken before a throne. And around it was a host of hevenly Angles. The Throne was pure white, and upon it sat a man of power. I knew that it was my Lord. His arms rested upon the arms of the throne, and blood dripped from them. Staining the throne red. It ran down the front of the throne and pooled in a puddle at His feet. Mingling with the train of his robe. I do not remember what he looked like, but I remember his eyes. So much Love. So much Compasion. SO Much PAIN. HE was hurting, because of Me. Bleeding, because of Me. Tears of blood ran down his cheeks. I heard him say with the ear of my spirt. "I love you." Three words. That cut to the heart. Tears began to run down my face. And I fell to His feet. Weeping. My garments became soaked in his blood. I saw myself as I was, UNworthey. A worm. Dirty. He reached out a lifted me to his lap, as if I were a child. And I imidiatly knew in my heart that he saw me as his child. I felt so comforted, so wanted. He knew me as I was and Loved me anyways. Your probly asking yourself, 'why am I telling this?'. Well last night the memory of this vision returned to me so stongly that I collapsed upon the floor in tears, begging forgiveness. I cried for over an hour ( I think, time was rather irrelivent to me at the time.) I didn't ask forgiveness for being a BL. Or for having sinful thoughts. No I begged forgiveness for ever doubting that he could love me. For denying him to myself. For becoming disallusioned. For forgetting that his Love has NO bounds. I may cause him pain sometimes. But what child doesn't hurt his parrent at onetime or another. I still have faith in my Lord and God. And because of last night, I hope I will be able to remember that he Loves me no matter what. Sometimes I wonder if Jesus can really save me. And at my lowest times, he always finds a way to tell me he's there. Any ways I thought I would share this with anyone who wants to listen. I feel it is a message that is important to all ppl. And so I post it. In hopes that it will help all who need it. Love Echo <((( Who remembers that LOVE knows NO bounds. |