Welcome - you're at the right place
Submitted by Forgiven on February 28 2000 at 18:28:33
In reply to I need your support -sorry for the long story- Submitted by TJ on February 28 2000 at 15:12:36
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Almost all of us are in much the same situation as you, knowing that we are able to relate to boys really well, yet tempted to go further than is appropriate. You've seen it from the other side - a reality you need to cling to if the temptation to go further does kick in. From my own experience I'd encourage you to try to spend time with older boys - from a practical point of view it is less catastrophic if something does go wrong and the boy is more likely to be able to cope - but in general it is healthier for you to be with people closer to your own age group. You would equally be wise to avoid taking any risks in being with boys on their own; if it does go wrong because you or a boy make a mistake (boys do initiate things) it can easily become very very problematic. You give the impression and probably believe that no one has any suspicions. This may be over optimistic!! My dark side is talking here - not least because of my own experiences. There's a really good side as well - you are in a position to reach boys who would otherwise be isolated and hurt and unreachable. It's a great joy when that does go well. As for telling - don't rush into ANYTHING. The current paranoia over paedophiles has led to laws in many states requiring even ministers to report any possible offenders to the police - and undoubtedly they would have to remove you from your work with boys. As the person most important in my life is about your age, having also graduated from high school last year and is now away at college :=(, I'd really enjoy having you to send emails to as well; he's straight but knows where I'm coming from and copes really well - in effect we have the friendship that your older friend chose to throw away - a pattern that I hope you can recognise as positive. Whether you choose to bless me by individual contact, I do encourage to hang around here and realise that we are part of what you need. So welcome - and rejoice that you are not alone in your struggles!! Hope to hear from you again soon - but overall, remember that Jesus has overcome the world - however bad things may seem at the moment! |