I do not think an element of superficiality is inherent to BLs, it is a trait of all, or at least most people. Probably more males but still plenty of females too. Just look at tv, movies, celebrity gossip, looks are stressed so much. It is not a good trait in humanity but you do not have to feel like you are extra special for having it.

I have found in my experience and from talking to other BLs that people seem to be less superficial when they are around boys more. Less so when they have a yf, if your yf is not the hottest boy ever but you love him looks will matter less. Also I have had the experience with the opposite where I knew a really really good looking boy but once I got to know him and his personality it turned me off real bad. If I had not gotten to know him I'd probably still think he was so great and hot. Other people I know have said similar things.

I suspect you would feel the same way too.

"I guess none of it really matters anyways, its not like I'm ever going to be with a boy anyways as I don't agree personally with the whole YF or adult child interaction thing"

Why?