Hey,

I can totally relate. Both of my parents know about my attractions and I've had conversations with them about it. But in relation to what Blackstone said, I'll feel like there has been some sort of a breakthrough, but then one of them or both will say something that makes me realize otherwise.

I know my parents love me a lot. And I know they want the best for me (much like how it sounds with your mother). And what they think is best is what the norm thinks is best... marriage... kids... nice career. I fear that things won't turn out that way at all. At least not to their expectations. It can be really frustrating. I want my parents to understand... I want them to accept me, but I think they just simply can't understand fully. And maybe that's for the best. I feel a major disconnect with my dad, and I honestly don't know what my mother thinks about me anymore.

I, too, don't really know what I want to do. I'm feel like I'm being pulled in so many directions. Do I do what will make my family happy? Do I try to live up to my parent's expectations? Do I do what will make me happy? Is that even possible? And yeah, I would love to have a yf and live happily ever after... but sadly, I don't think that is realistic. But plenty of BLs have many yfs throughout life... I hope I can be as fortunate.

Anyway, you're not alone, Mr. gaakz. I'm right there with you. Take it day by day... it'll all pan out just fine. :) (Hopefully :P)