As I recall, when my one and only YF was around 8 years old he just LOVED to cuddle with me. I had this one big, overstuffed easy chair and we both fit in it perfectly. He would put his head on my chest and his arms around me and we would snuggle like that for hours. That went on until he was twelve or thirteen, then all the cuddling and hugging was out the window, unfortunately. Oh, every now and then he would consent to a quick hug, but no more hour-long cuddling sessions, no more nice kisses on the cheek or on the lips...it was pretty much over. I think that once they reach that age, they have no more need for that kind of thing, which is really too bad. I mean, we are adults and WE love that kind of thing, right?

I know what you mean about a YF relationship being very one-sided. And I did my own fair share of spoiling the heck out of my YF, too. So much so that sometimes he would even get embarressed about it and tell me that I didn't really have to buy him all the stuff I did, etc. He did have a conscience after all. And yes you are right, boys do know who is who in a relationship. They aren't blind or dumb...for the most part. Of course they ARE young and they haven't yet learned how to act right sometimes, so they can be ungrateful and sometimes downright disrespectful. It can be sad and heartbreaking when you dump so much energy into the relationship. I'm sorry that you have had so many bad experiences with boys. I had one major YF in my life and the friendship had it's ups and downs, but for the most part it was quite good to absolutely great. Of course, as he got older the way we acted with one another changed. The physical closeness didn't happen as often but we were still very close in every other way. He didn't tell me that he loved me as often, but I knew that he did and he knew that I loved him too. He had pretty much figured out that I was gay, so things were a little bit different, although he didn't really care that I am gay. It didn't really bother him, I mean.

I do hope your friendship with your YF turns out much better than all the rest have been for you. Maybe, just maybe, you might be able to sneak a hug in sometime. Maybe you can put your arm around him during a time when both of you are having a man-to-boy conversation and are feeling particularly close or tender towards one another.