Re: Nice response
Submitted by GCFboi on December 06 2000 23:31:03
In reply to Nice response submitted by Jimf3 on December 06 2000 23:03:42
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Hehehe. Well, I've got some more explaining to do! First of all, I continually suffer from the failure to realize that people can't read my mind when I write! I tend to write in the way I would speak, but the nonverbal subtleties that would be present in real life conversation of course don't come through in the text. Maybe I need to learn more emoticons, or something. When I said "smart for people" that was a poor choice of words. What I meant is that it would be smart for somone who has the same beliefs I do. That is to say, it is smart for people to practice what they preach, or to think through their ideas about sexuality consciously. So for someone like me, who claims to believe that sex and love should always ideally go together, I would be smart to do my best to live up to that belief. But I guess I was assuming that everyone reading would share my beliefs, which I should not assume. Sorry, I will try to think through my word choices more carefully. Anyway, when I speak about "having sex" with another person, I am speaking about sexual intercourse that involves penetration. That is where I draw the line for myself now. But I have had one really cool friend for a while now, with whom I have enjoyed mutual masturbation on several occasions. But I did not consider that to be actually "having sex". It was more like playing around with company! I am totally not offended by or addicted to masturbation--it does not tempt me to be obsessive like more hardcore sex acts used to. I enjoy it, but I am not compelled to do it. So whether it is alone or with another person, I have kept masturbation as a good tool for me to express myself and satisfy my desires. BTW, I do still date guys, and I do kiss them and cuddle with them and jerk off with them, but I will not go farther than that on the first few dates. Alas, it has been a long time since I met a guy who I dated more than a few times! But since kissing is my favorite sexual activity of all, I am always overjoyed at the opportunity to kiss a cute boy! (But I usually save "french-kissing" for more serious relationships, too, since that is a very spiritual act). While I may restrict my behavior more than a lot of gay men would, it works for me, and the dates I do have now are always pleasurable. Nowadays, I would much rather have intimate, but more subtle sexual experiences, than the most wild raucous sex, that I end up regretting later. I guess I am more into tenderness and emotional intimacy now than I used to be. The other limitation that I place on myself, is that I will not break the age of consent law, even if I want to. So I will not even go so far as to get naked or even touch a boy who is under 16, even if he wanted me to, although no one that young has ever asked me out. (Most of the gay teens I know are over 16). |
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