Heh
Submitted by Altima on April 18 2001 19:43:56
In reply to Dear Altima, submitted by Huck Finn on April 18 2001 19:02:48
|
Well, I get wierd ideas like that when I literally talk to myself when I'm alone. A lot of the time it's all in my internal monologue (what great things, those internal monologues...) which sometimes seems like a very different person than myself. But today, as I walked home after renting a couple DVDs, I literally talked to myself all the way home (under my breath when there were others around of course, if I'm crazy, I don't need to announce it to everyone on the street) At first I started rambling to myself, something like "Look at all those people in the vidio store... They're all active participants, as I am, of one of mankind's most depressing traits. We're all trying so hard to escape our own lives. We need to get away from ourselves, to believe that Tom Cruise is our best friend for two hours, to be someone else and share their adventures. It's as if we can't accept reality. We have crafted a meticulous illusionary world for ourselves. Everyone watches all these spectacles and dramas without leaving their homes, staring at the Box to enlighten them. "And if they don't have access to televisions or cinemas, they almost always have radios, playing this hour's latest song from this hour's latest band. Always purging itself and refreshing itself, to keep up with society's collective attention span, which these days is bordering on Nil. A couple days ago I decided that after my exams, I'm going to enroll in an acting school, alongside my normal school. I'm going to be an active participant in creating this illusion for people. I'll either end up becoming more absorbed in the false world, or I'll finally be able to fully embrace reality, knowing completely that there is no other existance than my own. Haley Joel Osment got two million dollars from his latest film, A.I., which is finished shooting. He got lucky. He got started young, he had the full support of his parents to pursue acting, and lived in Los Angeles, which would have helped him immensely. His father was an actor, and encouraged him to audition for a Pizza Hut commercial at the age of 4, which opened the eyes of some Hollywood talent scouts. Things moved on from there. My parent's don't seem to have any specific expectations for me. They don't seem to want me to be anything in particular, they just want me to be good at it. My father is a gas turbine engineer. He doesn't encourage me to be a gas turbine engineer. Quite the contrary. My mother seems to encourage me to pursue different fields of occupation which she chooses at random. A good advertisement on TV. "Why don't you take up advertising Daniel?" The news covers a journalist winning a big libel case. "Why don't you look into journalism Daniel?" Dell Computers open new facilities in Ireland. "Why don't you look into IT, Daniel?" The thing about acting is that I will never make it big by staying in Ireland. No leading roles get cast in Ireland for anything. Only extras and minor players for films which don't even represent what Ireland is like (Hey, like I said, it's a fantasy world) Well, I once had a dream of taking to the skies, perhaps for the military. My heart condition threatens to forbid me from doing so. (It's minor, but not minor enough not to threaten the possibility) Now I have a dream that I CAN acheive, for once. I CAN succeed at this if I am willing to try, which I am. I must get out of Ireland to do it though. That will have to wait a while, my parent's wouldn't allow me to do anything like that now. Just great, my one dream needs support that isn't possible at the moment. Anything I can get for my dream, must be obtained by me, or not at all. (END_RANT: ... CONFIRMED) |
Follow ups: