Don't underestimate ...
Submitted by Nate on 2002-11-4 15:52:13, Monday
In reply to I'm outing myself tomorrow submitted by Oliver on 2002-11-4 01:47:09, Monday
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...the ability of seemingly loving Christians to turn on you and react out of fear and self-righteousness. They can make your life a living hell. I agree with your thinking about our need to live open lives before our Creator and to worship Him, rather than the things he has created. Secret sins have a consuming power which can be, needs to be, broken by confession and healing. However, there seem to be precious few Christians who are truly mature enough to love someone who confesses a sexual attraction to children. In my experience, those that claim to be that mature in their walk are not. You intend to put yourself in God's hands, but what you are proposing is to put your life in the hands of men. Once the cat is out of the bag, you will not regain control of what happens to you in that community. If I had it to do over again, I would move much more slowly. I think that I would try to find a group of Christians in another community who could serve as counselors and try to prepare them to be a support network. You will find that whoever you come out to is going to need support far more than you do. They are likely to be confused about their feelings, and afraid to accept the responsibility of knowing your secret. There are some Christian BLs who are finding support from the Church, but the ones that I know about have been very careful and patient in building their support network. And still it is risky. Thankfully, I have discovered that there is a wonderful lot that I can learn from and share with other BLs that I have met in real life. And the few Christian BLs that I have met serve very naturally as that support group for me at this point. They may not be professional clergy, but they have far more wisdom about how to deal with the real issues. So, Oliver, I think that you are on the right track in strengthening your relationship with God. But be cautious. What you do tommorrow cannot be undone. Feel free to email me if you want to. Peace, Nate |
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