marriage and MARRIAGE.....
Submitted by Forgiven on 2002-12-8 04:11:36, Sunday
In reply to Marriage of convenience submitted by Someone wishing to remain anonymous on 2002-12-7 20:03:16, Saturday
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The modern Western belief that there must be a strong romantic love between the partners in a marriage is an error - it is clear that down history successful marriages have been built on other bases, and the present divorce pandemic in the West suggests that we have got it badly wrong. 'Christian' marriage implies a permanent, exclusive, sexualised relationship between the partners. What you appear to be proposing does not conform to that model, and you would have to think very hard about how you celebrated the inauguration of such a relationship; a 'church wedding; would therefore appear to be inappropriate. However this does not prove that the legal format of a civil marriage would not be a suitable structure for the two of you to build your lives on; the two of you living together may well be better for both of you than living seperately. You may want to look at the experiences of 'fag hags' - a nickname applied to gay men and straight women who construct such partnerships. Also how far is she aware you are a BL (I assume that's why you are visiting us!) or does she just assume you are 'vanilla gay'? The issue of children is far more fraught. One very pointed question - would you be as happy to have a daughter as a son? Beyond that - how far are you having children for your own sake, and how far for theirs... |
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