It is not the real you
Submitted by Adam TBK on June 10 1999 at 22:47:13
In reply to Re: Thoughts for you and for others Submitted by F.O.D. on June 10 1999 at 18:35:48
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Hi FOD, Actually, I think I meant to say that individual conviction is heavily influenced by the social; influenced to an extent that any human being within living within the presence of those forces is heavily influenced, so much so that they don't know it any more. I also think that what you are calling a conviction in faith is this: a sexual dysfunction. At the very least, sexuality and religion are related. What I am saying is that Ben is onto something, but at its core, what he and others are onto is something more related to boys and sexual attraction to boys (and to other social forces) than anything else (such as faith). Take sex and the social away from the world of fundamentalist Christianity and you would have very few people, and perhaps no one, believing in it. "If I try to keep my faith hidden from him, I am lying to him, I am a hypocrite, and he will not know the real me." I hope he convinces you to live your life without the interference of this conviction. You said pretty much what my older friend said to me. But I knew the real him, before he "shared" his religion with me--and I liked him a lot for what he was (and still could be). You are your own person, and you ought to live your own life--not one given away on a gamble. You are worth more to society if you are spending your time to help relieve pain and suffering from the earth, instead of sitting in your home reading pages from the Bible. You probably cannot help your young friends develop the "conviction" that the Bible is not what you think it is. Right? Would their thinking process be strongly influenced by the fact that it is your conviction (passed down by others)? You don't seem to understand that you're making it very hard for any boy to come near you without taking on your convictions. Christian fundamentalists give up trying to "share" their convictions with others once they get exasperated--or once the 'beneficiary' gets exasperated. Thus, the sharing of convictions gets related to the keeping or losing of friendships--powerful forces that have nothing to do with convictions. There's no reason you have to tell your YF about your religion in much detail. I'm not lying to my mother if I refrain from telling her what I masturbate to. Why is that any different? It's personal, and it's about me. What do you get out of making it a point to tell others what you believe in? BTW, I don't see my former OF. I call him from time to time--but it's difficult. Adam |