God vs. Boys
Submitted by David on June 06 2000 22:22:30
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A revelation How real is this God of ours? Last weekend I was thrown a number of temptations, which I barely refused. I prayed for God's assistance, and he helped me. But there is a point in which nothing else matters except this sexual drive we all posses, and the idea of God seems to fade away. This is not a subtle confession of molestation, for I would never commit something so mean. I am scared out of my mind at the idea of my 12 year old cousin comming to stay with me for a week. I saw him last weekend, and the whole time he was trying to seduce me. I understand his hormones during this pubescent time in his life, but it was almost to much to handle. I had to leave him, and go to a local hotel where I had to live with the idea that I did the right thing, but why do I feel so crappy about it? I tell myself "I could have had him", but then I owuld feel like such a pathetic loser. This God of ours is so very difficult sometimes, and can appear so abstract. As if He is sitting out beyond the last star, and I am stuck here alone. Thank God for Jesus, one human we can all identify with. He was being executed and cried to God for help, only to realize that God was not going to come save him. We must accept certain truths about life. Our God is distant, silent, and abstract; and we can only ask him through prayer to slowly, I mean slowly Enlighten Our Darkness. God Speed David |
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