A Gift
Submitted by Ben on February 21 1999 at 13:25:34
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Last night the father of the twins gave me my own bible as a gift, which he inscribed with a really cool statement of thanks for my friendship. The bible means alot to me, not only because it is such an enourmous link to finding God, but also because of who it came from. I had dinner with the family before going out to a singles party (which I thoroughly hated, btw). My bond to the kids and to this family is growing every day, and I sit in disbelief that the two boys who I thought were so cute and so magically novel to watch, are now becoming a part of my life! Being able to drop by the house and sit with one of the boys to watch a college basketball game together, or toss around a football is something that I would not have dreamed of in a million years. The friendship with the father, someone who is doing more for me than my father ever did (ie - taking an interest in ME, not what grades I get or how much money I make, but the SOUL of me) is beyond my thanks. And the search for God, as frustrating as it is right now (I won't lie and say...yeah, that's it, I believe, I'm saved), is so enlightening, so spiritually exciting and promising. I can't help but believe that God is giving me an incredible gift, larger and more real and more meaningful than any gift I have ever received. I've almost toyed with the reasoning that I must believe in God, if for no other reason than to give thanks for these gifts. This is true Grace. I pray still though for guidance in finding the faith that I can practically taste, but is still elusive to me. Sorry if this post seems self absorbed (it IS), but it seemed better to share than not to. You are not alone. Ben |