A question about sexual fantasies
Submitted by Dusk on September 22 2001 22:31:30
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I'm a non-pedophile (gay), but a BL friend told me about this place, and it seemd like a good place to post a question I have. Have any of you successfully gone cold turkey on unwanted sexual fantasies? I suppose I could spend the rest of my life figuring out whether these fantasies are good for me or not, in any inherent way, but the plain fact is that I simply don't have control over my fantasies any more - they're eating up my life, to the extent of pushing out vitally important matters that I have to do (like my job). I've tried ignoring the fantasies, and it doesn't work. I've tried letting myself have a "little" of them, and it doesn't work. I've tried letting them have free reign (in the hopes that I'll eventually get bored with them), and that's turned out to be the worst choice of all; they've begun to take over my daytime life in a way they never did before. So I'm at the point now where, if my life isn't going to fall apart, I think I'm going to have to go cold turkey. ANd unfortunately, my situation is such that this means going cold turkey on sex altogether. That's why I'm here. If I told any of my gay friends about this, they'd say, "Oh, just go have sex with your partner." Unfortunately, that isn't an option for me. YOU guys know what it's like to have a choice between having a fantasy life or having no sex life at all, and I thought perhaps some of you had chosen the latter and could give me some tips. Do you have any experiences that would help me? Know any good books or groups I might consult? (I'm not keen on getting into the sex addiction groups but will if that's the only option left to me.) Trying not to sound too desperate, Dusk |
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