Boylove God and Pain
Submitted by David on April 04 2000 22:11:35
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As today is the second anniversary of the day I was Baptized I thought it only right to post on a website that incorporates my two favorite topics, Christianity and Boys. I came into the Roman Catholic church on April 4th 1998 at the age of 17. I came into boylove ever since I was 12. I converted from atheism, since my parents are not exactly religion friendly, but have nonetheless supported me in my Catholic decision. I have begun to ponder entering the priesthood (just what it needs another boylover!) But out of sincere desire to serve the spiritual, not an escape, although that is a wonderful side benefit of a vow of celibacy. After a long day at my local Bay Area junior college I decided I would attend a mass, seemingly I should, and wanted to. But while I was there listening to the Celebrant going on about the Psalms (of which 42 and 142 are great comforts to me) I found my mind wondering. What have I gained from entering this faith? From turning to religion? I have found meaning and hope for sure, but after six years (I'm 19) of desiring boys it has not gotten any easier. I still cry to myself at night, and cringe at the sight of a boy, as I do not need the difficulty that arises from what their beauty offers me. Where has God been all this time? Where has he been when I beg him to let me help a boy, or be with a boy? Where has he been all these years? Will this ever get better? Will I ever love another person like only this love could offer? Will my faith continue as my heart grows colder? Please as Christians and Boylovers please help me I have found great spiritual comfort on these websites, I hope that someone can please help me. God Speed David |
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