THE choice for celibate Christian BLs
Submitted by Forgiven on 2002-09-24 13:29:13, Tuesday
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The biggest choice that we have to make is whether we seek to establish appropriate relationships with boys, or avoid any contact whatsoever. It seems to be a big divide among us; most of us seem to have substantial and positive contact with boys, but there are a few that avoid them for a variety of reasons. I don't think there is a right answer; rather it is an issue that we need to find God's guidance in and follow it. To live without boys is the apparently safer option; there is no prospect of a safe relationship drifting into unsafe areas. But we are not using the ability that we have to relate to boys to do them good, and we are in danger of stoking up a fire of unhappiness that will burst into wholly wrong behaviour. If we do build constructive, positive relationships we do have something to offer; I treasure the tag applied to me of 'mentor' by one man who I spent a lot of time with in his last year in High School and has gone on to be a church housegroup leader (as well as married with a baby son). And at present I have as close friends a group of 'boys' whom I first got to know when they were 14 and who are now 21; it is hard to evaluate how constructive my relationship has been in my life, but I still see a lot of them, and I appreciate them. So for me that is the right answer, I believe that God has led me to develop these friendships - and to walk away from others. What conclusions have others come to? |
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