homosexuality?
Submitted by Splash! on September 06 2000 02:38:16
In reply to Yes, but what about ... submitted by ChoirBoy on September 05 2000 22:55:36
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Frankly, I don't know. I have yet to hear an argument on either side that totally convinces me. The Bible says that homosexuals are going to hell (1 Cor 6:9) along with thieves, liars, adulterers, etc. Doesn't that kind of put us all into the same group, most of us? My own confusion caused me to not go into detail about the sin of homosexuality in my last post -- I didn't want my confusion on this issue to lessen the strength of my argument against man/boy-sex. People have a tendency to focus on things they don't agree with rather than focus on the strength of other things that are being said. I didn't want that to happen (too much) in my last post. I, myself, had one homosexual relationship when I was 19-21 years old. Actually, it was more like a bisexual "I'll scratch your back if you scratch my back" kind of relationship. It was kind of sick now that I look back on it. Sometimes we don't see it that way until we're out of it. Just like that boy you talked about who was molested by his foster-father and then was disappointed when he wasn't adopted by the family. Sometimes we don't see the danger. I trust God that He knows the danger, and when He tells me through the Word not to do something, I should trust Him. "Father knows best." This is why I try to stay away from homosexual relationships and even homosexual thoughts. I just put my faith in God -- He knows what He's doing. And my own experiences have shown me some of the dangers of homosexuality; though, I realize that it's not the same for all homosexuals. My homosexual experience was very dramatic. We loved each other very much -- even talked marriage, which is strange since we weren't really committed to each other -- we still had heterosexual relationships! But we came home to each other. You know that saying, "Bros before 'hoes"? We took it to an extreme. But it was weird -- we didn't have sex with each other. I've never sodomized or been sodomized. We did a lot of other things though. "Sex" was a huge part of our relationship. That was at the core. I was very attracted to him and he, I think, must've been attracted to me. Generally, I'm not a homosexual. I'm very rarely attracted to other men, and when I am I don't think of having sex with them. I see parts of a man's body as ugly, and other parts as beautiful. I love to stimulate and be stimulated. But I don't think I could ever enjoy "intercourse" with another man. I believed that we were so in love with each other that our relationship must've been blessed and smiled upon by God. Afterall, we cared deeply for each other. I would've done anything for him at that time. Isn't that what unconditional love is all about? Isn't that what God wants between Christians? But I was wrong. I was deceived. Not to say that homosexuals can't truly love one another unconditionally without selfish motives. But when you're caught in the middle of it all, it's hard to see past it. It's hard to be objective. I was raised to be a Christian and had attended church all my life. Jesus was always a part of my life, but during this time, I had never felt so far away from God. I quit praying. I quit reading the Bible. But I still went to church. I justified my homosexual relationship by thinking it was totally based in love. Sometimes when my friend and I had "sex" we would use pictures of women in swimsuit-type magazines to stimulate us. What kind of relationship is that? How many wives let their husbands use a magazine to stimulate them into sex with them? I know that it does happen, but what kind of relationship is that? I actually didn't need a magazine to stimulate me because I found him very attractive and sexual to be with. But I was more attracted to women than men, and I know he was too. As I said, we continued to have heterosexual relationships outside of our own homosexual relationship -- but we felt so close to each other that we "knew" nothing could tear us apart -- even if we had girlfriends, our main priority was to each other. We lived with each other, not with our girlfriends. We understood each other better than any girl could, or so we thought. But our relationship was based totally in the flesh -- it wasn't spiritual at all. And later, when I tried to be spiritual, he didn't take me seriously. Maybe God knows something we don't about these type of relationships? It hasn't been made clear to me yet, but I trust that He knows better than me, so I'll take His Word for it. Anyway, the relationship got to be very dramatic, sickenly dramatic. You ever see movies of gay lovers getting mad with each other? It's hilarious -- to most "normal" people. And that is what happened between us. A couple times he'd call me and say, "I'm going to kill myself if you don't do this or that -- you're going to find me dead in the morning." What kind of relationship is that? Does this happen in most homosexual relationships? I don't know. I think we just enjoyed using each other for pleasure -- to get off, and maybe play mind-games and other power-plays with each other. It was pride, and it was selfishness. Homosexuality does seem selfish to me. How can a man pleasure another man the way he can pleasure a woman? Is he involved in the relationship merely because of his attraction and wanting to find sexual fulfillment based on that attraction? A lot of single heterosexual men do this also -- and this is called "adultery." Maybe it is as you say -- there is no marriage for homosexuals. Is this what makes it sin? Adultery is sin between a man and a woman. Premarital sex and sex with anyone outside of one's spouse is also a sin. How can a homosexual not have sex outside of marriage? In 1 Cor 7:8-9, Paul says that it is good to be single, but if we can't control our passions we should get married. What about the homosexual? In 1 Cor 7:36, Paul talks about a man behaving improperly toward a girl, but if the same man marries the girl it is no longer sin. What about the homosexual? The Bible seems to make it clear that sexual relations are only okay when they occur between two committed people (man and woman). How many homosexuals are committed to each other? I see homosexuals flaunt their sexuality on television talk shows and in gay parades. I'd hate to think that they are representative of homosexuals as a group. I see them kissing many different men -- not just one. I see them talking about having many partners -- not just one. How many gay men truly love one person enough to want to be with them their whole life and not have sex with any other man? There's a few different examples in the Bible of homosexuals going after other men -- I mean, really going after them (God's own people) against the other person's wishes. Is it like a sex addiction or something? Why do some homosexuals feel they have to "come out" and say, "I'm homosexual." Does that define who they are? Is that what they want to be known for above all else? Why should it matter to anyone else besides the one they love? Why do they feel the need to be accepted for who they are in bed? (I'm just posing these as rhetorical questions, but they're good to think about). Maybe this is why God calls homosexuality a sin. God says anything is a sin when it is given priority over Him. "Man cannot have two masters for he'll love the one and hate the other." We can't give any relationship a greater place in our lives than our relationship with the Lord. If we do, it becomes sin to us. Maybe the temptation is too strong among homosexuals? I don't know. Well, I'm going to stop here. I could go on forever, and I know this topic has been debated for centuries among millions and millions of people. There is still a lot of confusion about it. I am confused myself. All I can say is that there's a lot of things in the Bible that God has told us not to do with little explanation why. For example, he tells us not to eat pork or even oysters, and not to eat meat prepared in milk. Why? He doesn't say. But now we find out that pigs don't sweat -- they have no way to get rid of their toxins. And that oysters cause all kinds of health problems. And that milk and meat mixed together cause a lot of stomach problems, among other things. It may not be true for all, but studies have shown that these things can be unhealthy. I figure the same is probably true of God saying homosexuality is unhealthy. We may not fully see it now, but I'm afraid some of us will find out later. I choose to listen to God now -- I don't want to be left standing outside the Kingdom of God. But then, again, this brings up all sorts of other questions. Why did God create me with attractions toward people he says I'm not supposed to have sex with? Did he put it there for a reason, and what is it? Or did I create it in me myself by feeding my attraction for other boys/men over my attraction for women? Maybe I should've been feeding my love for God instead? Did I become unbalanced someway? What went wrong? Or is it normal? Is homosexuality wrong merely because it stops the life cycle from continuing through me? Aren't there enough heterosexuals to take care of that? Or is there something wrong with making all previous generations stop with me, and not allowing the family-line to continue through me? What about my brothers and sisters, and other family members? Anyway, didn't Paul say it was better to be single? How can one have babies when one's single? So, what's wrong with being single AND being sexually intimate? Etc., etc., etc. I see a lot of "maybes" and "perhaps" in your post as well. You bring up a lot of good points, but on this issue, I just don't know. I also have trouble seeing how an exclusive loving relationship between two people can be wrong. But what is love? It means so many different things to so many different people. And there seems to be so many different types of love. For some reason God appears to see the love between two males (or females) as being not quite up to par with what He has planned for us, or what He considers holy and right for man to do. I just don't know, but I'll take His Word for it. ~Splash* |
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